My novel’s 1st anniversary
Requiem for the status quo‘s anniversary is the perfect opportunity to announce my involvement with a fabulous project focused on Alzheimer’s disease.
I am one of over 150 authors from around the world who will be represented at the Alzheimer’s Association – Western Carolina Chapter’s Dementia Education conference in Charlotte, N.C., this August. I, and over 25 other AlzAuthors, have donated copies of their books, which will be given away in a raffle to conference attendees.
I wanted to support this cause because during my caregiving experience in the early 2000s, I most definitely could have used more fiction about Alzheimer’s to normalize my day-to-day stresses, and some up-to-date non-fiction to help my learn-as-you-go caregiving experience. Something else from which I surely could have benefited is the non-profit, AlzAuthors. AlzAuthors.com is a nonprofit website that shares information on books and blogs about Alzheimer’s and dementia. I am proud to say that I, too, am a member of this fine organization. Had it been available prior to my father’s death from Alzheimer’s disease, I no doubt would have tapped into its resources.
AlzAuthors started in 2015, when Founders Jean Lee from Ohio, Vicki Tapia from Montana and Marianne Sciucco from New York, who had also written books about Alzheimer’s, met in cyberspace. They discussed the growing need for resources about dementia. A year later, after Shannon Wierbitzky joined the team, the group started a website and published posts from 60 authors. In 2017, Canadian Kathryn Harrison and Ann Campanella from North Carolina joined the administrative team.
Since that time AlzAuthors has published weekly posts, sharing resources about books and blogs that focus on Alzheimer’s and other dementias. The site has grown to include over 150 AlzAuthors from around the world and has a bookstore with a vast collection of top books for individuals, doctor’s offices, assisted living facilities and other eldercare services. AlzAuthors also has a thriving presence on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest. AlzAuthors Jean Lee and Ann Campanella, whose memoirs were recently named to Book Authority’s Best Alzheimer’s Books of All Time List, will share “The Story Behind the Stories” of AlzAuthors at the Alzheimer’s Association conference.
“Together We Can,” the Dementia Education Conference held by the Alzheimer’s Association – Western Carolina Chapter, will take place on Wednesday, Aug. 29, from 8:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m.at the Friendship Missionary Baptist Church, 3400 Beatties Ford Road in Charlotte, N.C. The event is geared for healthcare professionals, caregivers, people living with Alzheimer’s or related dementia and members of the general public. Attendees will learn more about research, caregiving practices and tools to assist in the journey with Alzheimer’s. For more information, visit ALZ.org/NorthCarolina or call 800-272-3900.
For more information about AlzAuthors. visit their website: https://alzauthors.com/.
Lighten up Mondays
We had new windows installed upstairs and downstairs – the whole house – and with new windows come new wood trim around each window that needs painting. That’s what we’ve been doing and after four separate days of prepping and painting, we finally finished the downstairs this past weekend…in 89-degree weather and 75% humidity…and don’t even ask me how we’re gonna handle the 2nd-floor windows. Painting humor for you…but painting isn’t funny or fun.
*****
Two painters go fishing and find a honey hole. They pull in huge keepers with every cast. They soon catch their limit and the first painter says to the other, “this lake is huge, too bad we won’t be able to find this spot again.”
With that, painter #2 jumps overboard and disappears below the water. A short time later he resurfaces and gets back in the boat.
Painter #1 – What the heck were you doing down there?
Painter #2 – I marked this spot by painting big red X on the bottom of the boat.
Painter #1 – You idiot! What if we don’t get the same boat?
Lighten up Mondays
One of my sons-in-law is a commercial fisherman out of Petersburg, Alaska during the summer. To honor him, here’s a joke centered on the art of fishing.
The fishing season hasn’t opened yet, and a fisherman who doesn’t even have a license, is casting for trout as a stranger approaches and asks, “Any luck?”
“Any luck? Heck yes, this is a wonderful spot. I took 10 out of this stream yesterday” he boasts.
“Is that so? By the way, do you know who I am?” asks the stranger.
“Nope.”
“Well, meet the new game warden.”
“Oh,” gulped the fisherman. “Well, do you know who I am?”
“Nope,” said the game warden.
“Meet the biggest liar in the state.”
Kindness Fridays
Hiking always makes me feel good to be alive, even though my joints and muscles complain more often than not at the completion of each hike.
There’s so much goodness found in the mountains, streams, lakes, and forests of the Pacific Northwest. Along with that goodness is the kindness that oozes out of every beautiful sight we behold:
- the sweet and varied songs of the birds that are hidden from sight, but not by hearing;
- the welcome shade provided by trees that have been around longer than my timespan on this earth and that will remain long after I’m gone;
- the flowers and berries, both common and unique, that serve to add color to the landscape, thus softening the feel of the dirt, rocks, and rooty trails that receive our eager feet;
- the top of the mountain vistas – what my husband and I call the payoff – that await our sweaty, achy, bodies, making us forget the out of breath effort it took to get there; and
- the people we meet along the way who love hiking as much as we do.
At yesterday’s vista view, we met a young man who with his wife, moved to Seattle from Utah. Just three weeks into his Washington State experience Matt is in love with what our state has to offer. His wife’s job is what prompted their move: she is in her medical residency at Seattle Children’s Hospital. She has the overnight shift so Matt is taking advantage of her daytime sleep schedule to explore the new place in which he lives.
Matt is a microbiologist who is putting off looking for a job for a few weeks while he acquaints himself with his new home. We recommended he enjoy the best weather the Seattle area has to offer before getting anywhere near a laboratory. We also told him we felt certain he would have no problem finding work in his field given the renowned medical community in the area. We had a simply delightful conversation with this man who, after I mentioned my family’s history with Alzheimer’s, offered the promising breakthrough just discovered regarding a virus that might contribute to the disease.
Whether Baby Boomers like ourselves, young children, or everyone in between, the hiking community just seems to give off kindness vibes – a kindness that provides lasting benefits for these late-in-life hike enthusiasts. I know this has been a far different Kindness Fridays to which you may be accustomed, but I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless.
Lighten up Mondays
With United States’ birthday occurring on July 4th, I’ve decided to provide some statements made by none other than Benjamin Franklin.
In the great tradition of American humor, the title of “First American Humorist” rightfully belongs to Benjamin Franklin. He was the beginning of a long line of writers who created a uniquely American form of humor filled with clever wit, folksy wisdom, and a generous portion of irreverence.
In his Poor Richard’s Almanac, Franklin wrote many clever sayings which are still part of our cultural heritage today. At 26, Franklin published the first edition of Poor Richard’s Almanac under the pseudonym Richard Saunders.
- Remember that time is money.
- A little neglect may breed mischief: for want of a nail, the shoe was lost; for want of a shoe the horse was lost, and for want of a horse the rider was lost.
- A penny saved is a penny earned.
- Any fool can criticise, condemn and complain and most fools do.
- Early to bed, early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.
- Fish and visitors smell in three days.
- Genius without education is like silver in the mine.
- God helps them that help themselves.
- Haste makes waste.
- Hide not your talents. They for use were made. What’s a sundial in the shade?
- It is hard for an empty bag to stand upright.
- Little strokes fell great oaks.
- Never leave that till tomorrow which you can do today.
- Three may keep a secret if two of them are dead.
- Well done is better than well said.
- In this world, nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes.
- There never was a good war nor a bad peace.
- Never contradict anybody.
Caregiver Guilt
Just under seven years ago I posted this article about the guilt many caregivers feel when they are convinced nothing they do for a loved one is good enough. I felt the need to repost it today.
Do you feel as though you don’t visit your loved one often enough at the long-term care (LTC) facility in which they live? Try to acknowledge that guilt is a feeling that may not necessarily reflect an accurate reality of how attentive you are towards your loved one.
The local caregiver.
Many people have expressed their concerns to me that they’re just not doing enough for their loved one who lives in a LTC facility. Even when a caregiver visits Mom several days a week, the caregiver still feels guilty for not making more of an effort to be there for her.
Guilt is a valid feeling – I believe all feelings are valid – but the feeling of guilt may not accurately reflect what is going on. Let’s face it, most of us are hard on ourselves. The old adage, “we’re our own worse critic” came about resultant from…
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Kindness Fridays
Today I celebrate an author friend who has been so supportive of my writing journey. Jill Weatherholt is a fabulous writer of inspirational romance novels. Second Chance Romance is the first in the Love Inspired series that will grab you from the very first page. The second in the series, A Father for Bella, will be released August 1, 2018, but is available for preorder right now. I already ordered my copy and can hardly wait for the continuation of a series that has warmed my heart and has me wanting more.
This delightful author friend of mine inspires kindness wherever she goes, and she certainly warrants a Kindness Friday spot on my blog today for it is today that Jill posted an essay I wrote that gives readers a peek at my personal caregiving experience with my father. You can view that post, here. I wrote about this personal experience of mine when Jill indicated she wanted to feature me yet again on her author site, and could I please write about a caregiving episode from my past.
It was my pleasure to do so, just as it is my pleasure to give you, my blog followers, a peek into this North Carolina author’s exceptional romance novel series. I certainly hope you will pick up your own copies of Jill’s two books in the Love Inspired series, and that you will perhaps gift others who also might be interested in receiving their very own copies. At the very least, be sure to share this post with your friends so they can have quick and easy access to her novels’ Amazon purchase links.
The best part about my own publishing experience has been the authors I’ve met along the way; what giving and loving individuals they have proven to be. My life is greatly enriched by them. Thank you, Jill, for your friendship.
Lighten up Mondays
Our home is in construction mode while getting every window and screen replaced on both floors of the house. That mode includes workers using our downstairs bathroom – the window company didn’t provide an onsite porta potty – and noise, dust, and BUGS everywhere. They started their work last Wednesday and by Friday I had counted 12 mosquito bites on my body. Let’s face it, when a window is removed, bugs make a run for the border…that border being the portal into our home where a window used to be. So here it goes, my attempt at lightening my mood as there are two more days remaining of work this week.
- Do you want to hear a construction joke? Oh, sorry, I’m still working on it.
- I find construction work to be riveting.
- I never wanted to believe my dad was stealing from his job as a road worker but when I got home, all the signs were there.
- My electrician friend accidentally blew the power to the ice-making factory, now they’ve gone into liquidation.
- Never trust an electrician with no eyebrows.
- Google says, “I know everything.” Facebook says, “I know everyone.” The internet says, “Without me, you’re all nothing.” Electricity says, “Keep talking, fools.”
Kindness Fridays
Today’s kindness post is an extremely short one but it’s one I thought you would appreciate.
Us Pacific Northwest residents spent months complaining about the rain and cold temperatures and now that it’s hot, we are of course dreaming of cooler days. (We aren’t easy to please, us PNWers.)
I went on my weekly grocery shopping trip the other day and what greeted me and every other shopper was the following oasis from the sweltering outdoor temperatures.
Such an easy effort on the store employees’ part, but it meant the world to me. You see, even the smallest of kindnesses can change the direction of a person’s day.
Lighten up Mondays
Vacation/beginning-of-summer humor:
- I don’t make enough money to go on vacation so I’m just going to get drunk until I don’t know where I am.
- “How was your vacation?” “I’m analyzing it now. I only got eight likes but one of them was from someone really influential.”
- I don’t need a vacation, I’d be happy with a trip to the bathroom by myself…said every mother of young children.
- Being on vacation with my family has brought me so much closer to my iPad.
- I don’t need a vacation, I just want time to sit, read, snack, and take a nap. Basically, I want to be in kindergarten.
- I’m sorry your post-vacation workload has negated all the benefits of your vacation.
- Honey, pack your fat pants, we’re going on a cruise!
- There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after vacation.
- If you answer “Awesome” to the question, “How are you?” you are either a) drunk; b) practicing your sarcasm; or c) on your last day before vacation or retirement.
Lighten up Mondays
Just recently received a notice that my Visa credit card will be replaced by another due to suspected fraudulent activity reported by a vendor. Apparently, 1000s of accounts have been affected. So today’s humor focuses on credit cards because I’m needing some humor right now because once the new card arrives, I will need to update 16 vendors/utility companies, etc. for which we pay our bills with the Visa card. Gotta get those miles, baby, thus the reason why we charge and pay off the balance every month.
- A woman placed her credit card on the dressing room visiting chair, tried on a new dress and asked the card, “Should I get this dress? How do I look in it?” to which the credit card said, “Meh.” That’s what she gets for having a no-interest credit card.
- They say numbers don’t lie but my recent credit card bill shows that I had a lot more fun on vacation than I actually did.
- A grizzly bear enters a fast food place for lunch and hands the employee a credit card to which the employee says, “Sorry, we don’t take credit cards. Hey, look at me, I’m stopping a charging grizzly! Ha! Ha! Ha!”
- I haven’t reported my credit card stolen because the person who stole it is spending less money than my spouse.
- A woman received a letter from her credit card company that said, “Due to the extremely responsible manner in which you have handled your account, your card has been canceled.”
Kindness Fridays
This week I focus on the kindness of a fellow Black Rose Writing author, R. Bruce Logan. Bruce and I have never met, but through both of our association with the same publisher we developed an online relationship in which I feel I’ve known him for some time. Good news? My husband and I will meet Bruce and his wife late June when they are in the Seattle area. What a delightful lunch date that will be.
Bruce kindly reviewed my novel Requiem for the status quo on his blog The Narrative Arc. That kindness inspired my own exchange of kindness by reviewing his novel Finding Lien and teasing you about its sequel, As the Lotus Blooms.
I am providing my Five Star Amazon review from a year ago, as well as my additional comments:
Finding Lien grabs you from the opening scene. Wow, I really enjoyed this novel. The author has a way of describing scenes so that the reader is transported right there. But it’s not just the scenes that are clear, it’s his description of the characters that comes through loud and clear, without robbing the reader of her or his own impressions of what a specific character might look like.
The action in this novel did not lag. I wanted to find out what happened next and was not satisfied to put the book down until such scenes had played out.
Bruce’s love of and familiarity with Vietnam and the surrounding areas give the reader confidence that what they’re seeing through his descriptions are right on the money. Delightful. Addendum: how could he possibly know so much about Vietnam’s geography and history? He is a retired Army officer who has been giving back to the country in which he served, Vietnam, for many, many years.
Having completed Bruce’s very well written Finding Lien, I jumped at the opportunity to be a beta reader for the sequel. As the Lotus Blooms, with a release date of September 20th, seamlessly carries on from where Lien left off. If I could have read it faster I would have, a paradoxical statement if there ever was one. While wanting to read what came next, I didn’t want the novel to end. I would have done my emotions a favor by reading it as slowly as possible but speed won out, which left me wondering, “Will there be a book three?” I don’t know the answer to that question so nothing you do to bribe me for the answer will benefit your own curiosity.
What I can say, however, is that you should mark your calendars for the sequel’s release September 20, 2018, and read Lien in the interim. You will not be disappointed.
Kindness Fridays
Long distance relationships don’t always work out but the relationship I have with an Adelaide, Australia online magazine works to perfection. I’ve never wanted to be the selfish one in this relationship, but I feel I’ve received far more from it than they have.
A wee bit of history: I’ve been writing for this magazine off and on for some time and then late last year, Grandparents Day Magazine offered me my own column; my own byline. Now I’m guaranteed a page in every publication.
Then, just a couple weeks ago, the editors/founders of the magazine reached out to me wanting to promote a writers’ group to which I belong: AlzAuthors. AlzAuthors is made up of a compendium of authors who share their personal experiences with Alzheimer’s disease and other dementias to benefit others. Their motto is: To make a difference. One can sing a lonely song, but we chose to form a choir and create harmony.
So today’s celebration of kindness is two-fold: one, Grandparents Day Magazine generously reached out to me and the author group to which I belong; and two, AlzAuthors members chose to share their difficult Alzheimer’s disease journeys so that others could benefit from their vast experience – much of it learn-as-you-go. As a member of the AlzAuthors group, I can testify to the fact that once I had been through a family caregiving experience – for me it was for my father – I hoped it wasn’t for naught. Being able to share my experience with others through my novel’s publication just seemed right. The same can be said for the more than 150 books written by the AlzAuthors members.
And that, my friends, is my Kindness Fridays for this week.
Lighten up Mondays
We have two teachers in our immediate family: a daughter that teaches at a local high school and a son-in-law who teaches at a local elementary school. Time for some “Is it summer vacation time yet?” humor in celebration of teachers.
- Homework: the teacher’s way of finding out how smart the parents are.
- Every time someone types “to funny” I immediately picture them, fist in the air, going on a quest to find funny.
- I’m just a teacher, standing in front of an interactive projector, begging it to work for my lesson plan today.
- I hate it when I plan my day and nobody follows the script.
- Teaching is like acting if you were in five plays at once and you had to give every member of the audience a one on one performance.
- I love having parent conferences at the grocery store – said no teacher ever.
- Judging a teacher on their students’ test scores makes as much sense as judging a farmer on his crop without accounting for drought, freezes, or disease.
- And finally, a little admonishment for those student clock-watchers:
Kindness Fridays
Celebrating my 65th birthday today and celebrating the wonderful parents who raised me.
Mom and Dad were fair people who were very dedicated to their three children. They were supportive and immensely forgiving of Don, Mary, and me. The latter attribute included both not letting us get away with anything, while teaching us the importance of making life decisions that would make us better citizens of the world in which we inhabited.
Mom was the creative half of our parents, sewing all our clothes and actively involved in the musical community throughout her life. She was a master pianist and sang tenor equal to or better than most male tenors. She was also an activist, a trait I am happy to have inherited. Dad was the jokester of the two, but managed to balance that fun side with extraordinarily practical aspects of childrearing so we would become successful, contributing adults.
Mom and Dad were extremely kind – to family, friends, and strangers – and taught us to consider each and every person with whom we came in contact, as equal to ourselves, regardless of their station in life, their ethnicity, race, or religion. Us kids had a really good start in life because of their parenting, and now that we’re all three in our mid to very late 60s (that’s you, Don) I can proudly say we didn’t turn out all that bad.
Lighten up Mondays
Mother’s Day is behind us but not the humor centered around mothers. Here you go!
- You know you’re a mom when picking up another human to smell their butt isn’t just normal, it’s necessary. (Same applies to grandmothers, or is that just me?)
- Mother: one person who does the work of 20 for free.
- Don’t wake up mom! There are at least seven species who eat their young, your mom may be one of them!
- Mom #1: How do you get your sleepyhead son to get up in the morning? Mom#2: How? Mom#1: Put the cat on the bed. Mom #2: How does that help? Mom #1: The dog is already there.
- A mother mouse and a baby mouse are walking along when suddenly a cat attacks them. The mother mouse shouts “BARK!” and the cat runs away. “See?” the mother mouse says to her baby. “Now do you see why it’s important to learn a foreign language
- Sweater: something you wear when your mother gets cold.
- Bought my Mum a mug which says, “Happy Mother’s day from the World’s Worst Son”. I forgot to mail it but I think she knows.
Lighten up Mondays
Pain humor, just because.
- Many years ago, the best painkiller was ice; it was particularly effective if you poured whiskey over it.
- Throwback Thursday reminds me of when I only had to take one medication.
- Being sick is just your body’s way of saying you’re way to awesome and you need to slow down so everyone else can catch up.
- If you still have energy after walking up the stairs, your opinion about chronic pain is irrelevant.
- Said the doctor to his patient, handing him a bottle of pills: “I want you to take one of these every day until I think of something else.”
- My immune system attacks itself, what does yours do?
- You know you’re in pain when the sun is too loud.
- “But you don’t look sick.” “Please tell me what sick looks like and I’ll try to do better next time.”
- Why are there never any good side effects? Just once I’d like to read a medication bottle that says, “May cause extreme sexiness.”
- I’m not one to brag, but I totally got out of bed today.
- Where does it hurt? I’m sorry, I don’t understand the question.
Kindness Fridays
Over the years I’ve discovered that when we are part of a community of people, our quality of life increases. The support of others can’t be beat. For me, community is like-minded people with a common thread through their lives that provide meaning and purpose for one’s day to day existence.
I found community in a writer’s group called AlzAuthors, a compendium of authors who have all been affected by Alzheimer’s disease and other dementia. All of us authors share our experiences through our non-fiction and fiction works to bring knowledge, comfort, and understanding to those on a similar journey to the one we have already completed. Trust me, we all wish such a group were not necessary; that the common thread we share didn’t involve the always fatal disease of Alzheimer’s and related dementia; but it is necessary and we’re filling a need that as of this writing doesn’t show any chance of abating.
I’ve never met any of these authors – I live in Washington State and the rest of the authors represent just about every state in our nation – but because of our common journeys, we are members of a community. Are we all politically aligned identically to each other? Probably not. What about religious practices, do we follow the same spiritual practices as every member of the group? Hardly, but it doesn’t matter. What we have in common does matter: we are dedicated to encouraging and helping families and individuals whose lives have been interrupted by Alzheimer’s disease. Speaking for myself, I am so glad that my novel, Requiem for the status quo, can reflect the good and the bad decisions I made and other individuals made, so that those who are still on the Alzheimer’s journey might do better because they know better. I hope you’ll get to know us AlzAuthors through our website and that you’ll become an AlzAuthors Reader Community once you’ve browsed through our bookstore. Click here to go directly to the AlzAuthors Bookstore to find a library of books – more than 140 as of today – that link directly to Amazon or other purchase outlets.
So that’s it. This week I celebrate the kindness I have found in the AlzAuthors Community. Sure beats going it alone.
Lighten up Mondays
Last day of April and here comes May, pretty much my favorite month of the year: my grandson’s birthday, my birthday exactly one week later, and Mother’s Day. Let’s focus on birthdays and mothers for this week’s funnies.
- You know you’re getting old when you go to an antique auction and three people bid on you.
- Did you hear about the love affair between sugar and cream? It was icing on the cake.
- Statistics show that those who have the most birthdays live the longest.
- Why is a computer so smart? Because it listens to its Motherboard.
- What did the mommy spider say to the baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.
- All mothers have intuition. Great mothers have radar.
- Simon’s mother said, “You won’t amount to anything because you procrastinate” to which Simon responded, “Oh yeah? Just you wait.”
Kindness Fridays
The man with whom I chose to spend the rest of my life on our wedding day, February 10, 2000, is the subject of this week’s Kindness post.
My husband says he’s not blind, but sometimes I’m not so sure. I mean, if he has perfect vision, albeit corrected by glasses, how can he not see what I see?
- No makeup whatsoever during the day unless I’m going somewhere or someone’s coming to our house. My face is multi-colored due to rosacea and sun damage. Without wearing liquid foundation, I’m a pretty scary sight to see. Apparently, the rose-colored glasses he wears don’t see those flaws.
- When my absolutely fabulous hair stylist cuts my hair a wee bit too short because Molly and I got to talking and I lost track of the time and how much hair she cut off, I return home with something just short of a buzz cut. I walk in the door apologizing before I can even say, “Hello, honey, I’m home!” Jerry takes one look at me and says, “I see you got your hairs cut and you got your money’s worth. It looks nice.”
- When I went through a period of very low body weight because of a medical condition, I focused on trying to gain weight because my clothes just hung on my bones. He said, “You are always beautiful to me, but I’d rather you be healthy and overweight than skinny and not well.”
- A year ago, I had some nasty skin cancer removed from my right shin/calf area. One year later, the scar is still horrendous in my eyes and I’d venture to say, in most peoples’ eyes. The other day we were shopping at Target and as we passed the racks of women’s shorts I said, “Not gonna buy me any of those. No one wants to see these legs.” His response, “I do.”
So there you have it, this absolutely non-critical, always complimentary husband of mine is probably someone I don’t deserve, but he married me so he’s stuck with me. When I’ve said those words to him in the past, he’s responded, “And you’re stuck with me, aren’t we lucky?”
Lighten up Mondays
The other day, I attended a photo session with my grandson and his parents. I managed to willingly make a fool of myself to make him laugh and smile for the camera, and it was my pleasure. Thus, photography is on my mind for this week’s funnies.
- Photography is an art of observation. It has little to do with the things you see and everything to do with the way you see them. (Elliott Erwitt)
- There are no bad pictures, that’s just how your face looks sometimes.
- You might be a photographer’s child if you can’t play dress up without it becoming a photoshoot.
- I am a plastic surgeon, a magician, a stylist, a social media guru, a therapist, and a master of light. I am a photographer.
- Photographer nightmare: trying to get thirty half drunk & hungry people to look at you at the same time.
- How to irritate your professional photographer. “After you take that shot, can you take the same one with my phone?”
- A photographer went to a socialite party in New York. As he entered the front door, the host said, “I love your photographs, you must have a fantastic camera.” The photographer said nothing until the dinner was finished and then said, “That was a fabulous dinner, you must have a fantastic stove.”
Kindness Fridays
Having surgery, regardless of how minor, is on the bottom of my list of enjoyable activities, but my recent cataract surgeries contained a huge kindness element for me that raised that procedure closer to the top.
Plain and simple, Pacific Cataract & Laser Institute located in Bellevue, WA, knows how to treat their patients. From initial consultation to post-surgery goodbyes, each staff member offered kindness of which many medical practices aren’t convinced is necessary. Keep in mind, PCLI is an extremely busy medical and surgical office. They perform approximately 50 cataract surgeries two days a week so the comings and goings of their patients make for an oftentimes full waiting room, an always busy front desk, and a maxed out medical staff that never gave the impression that you were just another business statistic for the books.
A separate element of kindness that existed while waiting in the pre-surgery area with other cataract surgery candidates was the camaraderie that existed amongst us. Some were there for their second eye, others, their first. For my first eye, I was extraordinarily nervous in that pre-surgery room, knowing what was coming next: numbing injections into the eyeball. After receiving said injections, I sat in the next surgery waiting area adjacent to and visible by the other candidates awaiting their injections. When the nurse came to usher me into the surgical suite, I waved to those patients and said, “Goodbye my wonderful fans!” drawing a laugh from everyone there that could be heard by my husband in the general waiting area of the medical practice. Perhaps that served as a kindness to those Nervous Nellies and Neds awaiting their next step, I certainly hope so.
And now some more kudos. My personal eye doctor, Susan Wynne of Eastside Vision Care, who referred me to PCLI, mirrors the same commitment to customer service and kindness. Dr. Wynne provides the day after, week after, and month after follow up care post surgery for me. After my first cataract surgery, I more or less got freaked out because of the vision anomalies experienced during my recovery. She compassionately provided a clear explanation for what I was experiencing; she talked me down from my immediate concerns that one could characterize as being somewhat anxious, to believing my vision going forward was forever ruined. Prior to becoming a patient of Dr. Wynne’s earlier this year, my husband and I had little satisfaction for the eyecare we received over the years. We would dread the yearly vision exams because the various doctors with whom we met a) seemed not to care, and b) didn’t provide the type of attention we felt our eyes demanded. Dr. Wynne is certainly the exception.
So, there you have it: two medically focused happy endings provide this week’s edition of Kindness Fridays.
SEE you next week!
Lighten up Mondays
U.S. Tax Day cometh!!! Some taxing jokes for you.
- People who file their taxes on the first day are the grown-up version of the kids who ask the teacher for extra homework in school.
- Worried about an IRS audit? Avoid what’s called a red flag. That’s something the IRS always looks for. For example, say you have some money left in your bank account after paying taxes. That’s a red flag. (Jay Leno)
- I’m not going to pay taxes. When they say I’m going to prison, I’ll say ‘No, Prisons cost taxpayers a lot of money. You keep what it would have cost to incarcerate me, and we’ll call it even.’ (Jimmy Kimmel)
- Why won’t sharks attack tax inspectors? Professional courtesy. (unknown)
- Children may be deductible, but they are still taxing. (unknown)
- Tax Day is the day that ordinary Americans send their money to Washington, D.C., and wealthy Americans send their money to the Cayman Islands. (Jimmy Kimmel)
- Death and Taxes: Of life’s two certainties taxes is the only one for which you can get an automatic extension.
- On my income tax Form 1040 it says “Check this box if you are blind.” I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away. (Tom Lehrer)
Kindness Fridays
My sister, Mary, is one of the kindest people I know. We are only eight months apart in age. You see, Mary was adopted by our parents after our mother suffered three miscarriages. Then, as oftentimes happens, once the adoption procedures commenced my mother got pregnant with me. Growing up, Mary and I always had each other as friends; we always had a playmate. People mistakenly thought we were twins; that’s how close we were, and still are.
So this wonderful, extraordinarily artistic sister of mine did something for me in response to my recent left eye cataract surgery. (See her website that spotlights some of her paintings.)
My siblings and I were raised as Roman Catholics. In our adulthood, we have followed different spiritual paths so that none of us follow the religion in which we were raised. With that said, however, Mary went to Mass the day after my eye surgery because she felt that our parents would also be there and would provide an added prayer boost to Mary’s intentions.
My sister feels very strongly about her connection with our long-deceased parents as prayer partners during Mass and has gone an additional time just this week with the intention that my left eye experiences 100% healing. She will also go next Wednesday so that my right cataract surgery that takes place the day before (April 17th) will be a complete success with no complications.
Mary has a very full and busy life with 5 children and 9 grandchildren. She volunteers every Tuesday morning to collect donated food from local grocery stores for her church’s lunch ministry. She is very attentive to her mother-in-law whose failing health requires a great deal of Mary’s and her husband’s time. She drives friends to doctor appointments, babysits her grandchildren…you get the idea. She’s busy, so adding yet another To Do to her growing list of responsibilities truly says a lot about her.
To be sure, we need more people like my sister who is the embodiment of kindness. Mary’s light shines in many places, near and far, a light that has landed on many over the years.
Lighten up Mondays
Through today’s Monday funny, I’m venting about the State of Washington Department of Revenue website where I tried everything I possibly could to log in and file my quarterly business taxes ($0) for the first quarter of 2018. I used the super-secret-super-secure-your-life-depends-on-it Log in identity and password and nope! It didn’t work. I wrote them a missive by email over the weekend and will await their pearls of wisdom so I can be a fine, upstanding business person.
So lucky you, here are some still relevant statements about the government made by Will Rogers many years ago:
- “I don’t make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.”
- “This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when a baby gets hold of a hammer.”
- “The budget is a mythical bean bag. Congress votes mythical beans into it, and then tries to reach in and pull real beans out.”
- “If you ever injected truth into politics you’d have no politics.”
- “There’s no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.”
- “The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf.”
- “The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.”
Kindness Fridays
The other day I was in the clothing department of a store I frequent, found the item I wanted to purchase, and made my way to the sales counter…with a 20% coupon in hand.
“Do you have any other coupons?” the salesperson asked.
“Why, no, just the one.”
“You can ask me.”
Not certain what I was supposed to do at that point I asked, “Do you have any coupons?”
Yep, she sure did, which she scanned bringing the price of the item even lower…almost to the point where I was wondering if they would owe me money, rather than the other way around.
The salesperson didn’t have to be generous and kind like that, but she was.
And that’s my Kindness Friday for this week. Don’t you just love it?
Lighten up Mondays
It seems appropriate that today’s funnies will focus on eyesight because I’m having cataract surgery on my left eye today, hoping for better focus.
- If rolling your eyes burned calories, for many people Facebook would be their gym.
- Husband: “I think I’m doing fine. Do you really think I need glasses?” Wife: “Well, considering you’re trying to make a phone call using the TV remote, yes.”
- I wear glasses so I can dramatically remove them to display anger. It was awkward trying to do that with contact lenses.
- Women, you know you’re getting old when you have to wear your glasses in the shower to shave your legs.
- Did you hear the joke about the optician who fell into the lens grinder? He made a spectacle of himself.
- George’s long life was drawing to a close. His family surrounds him on his deathbed. George asks to see his optometrist. So his family gets Dr. Kaplan who on seeing George, says he hates seeing him like that and asks if there’s anything he can possibly do for him. George responds, “Doc, before I go, there’s one thing I have to know. Which one was clearer, A or B?
Kindness Fridays
This week’s kindness illustrates a lesson my maternal grandmother passed on to my mother, who then passed it on to me.
The best way to paint this picture is to assume you’re in the kitchen, you pull out a gallon of milk from the refrigerator, take it to the counter to pour yourself a glass of milk and the full glass of milk spills on the counter, over the edge of the counter, and onto the kitchen floor.
If another family member is in the near vicinity, that family member intervenes, tells the person who inadvertently spilled the milk to leave the kitchen, and the other family member cleans it up.
“But Mom, I spilled it, I should have to clean it up.”
“You didn’t do it on purpose, Irene. You already feel bad for spilling the milk, let me lessen your burden by cleaning it up for you.”
And that’s what happened throughout my childhood, and it’s what happens now in my adulthood. A little kindness goes a very long way…all the way from Grandma Conroy’s Edmonton, Alberta kitchen in the 1920s thru 1940s, all the way to mine in Redmond, Washington in the 21st-century.
Lighten up Mondays
Sorry for missing a couple Lighten up Mondays. I return today and also introduce the new “symbol” of the series. This week’s focus is spring. I hope your Monday, and the remainder of the week, bring you reasons to smile.
- Why is everyone so tired on April 1?… Because they’ve just finished a long, 31 day march!
- What can be seen in the middle of the months ‘April’ and ‘March’, that cannot be seen in the beginning or end of either month?… the letter “r.”
- What falls but never gets hurt?… The rain!
- Why are frogs so happy?… They eat whatever bugs them.
- What do you call a rabbit with fleas?… Bugs Bunny
- Why did the farmer bury all his money?…. to make his soil rich!
- Why did the farmer plant a seed in his pond?… He was trying to grow a watermelon.
- How do rabbits keep their fur neat? They use a harebrush.
- What is a spring chick after it is five months old? 6 months old.
- What did the mother worm say to the little worm that was late? Where on earth have you been?
Compare and Contrast: Good News vs Bad News
Our extended family recently went through a very difficult time with one of our members diagnosed with a large brain tumor. That tumor was removed this past Monday, March 12th.
My husband and I had the privilege of keeping the spouse of this family member company at the hospital during the day’s nail-biting, angst-filled four-hour surgery. All of us, family and strangers with a loved one in surgery, were gathered in the same neurosurgery waiting room, a room where the surgeon meets up with families immediately after the surgery to deliver the exploratory news that summarizes the surgery and its outcome.
Approximately fifteen minutes prior to our surgeon’s meeting with us, another neurosurgeon met with a family fifteen feet away from us in the waiting area. Their news was not at all good. The only words I heard were, “I know you hoped this surgery would be the end of it but that is not the case I’m sorry to say.” The four daughters and husband immediately started sobbing. I felt I was an unwelcome observer because of the grief I witnessed.
Then my family member’s surgeon met with us and declared that he had removed all of the massive tumor from my sister-in-law’s brain and it was not cancerous. We were relieved and felt exhilarated but tamped down our excitement.
How can it be that in the course of a quarter hour’s worth of time, one family’s extreme happiness could co-exist with the other family’s extreme devastation?
I guess the answer is that life happens to all of us; sometimes it is good, and other times it is not. Very sobering, to be sure.
I am ecstatic that our news was good but very much aggrieved that the other family’s was not.
Living: the ultimate team sport 