Kindness Fridays

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Celebrating my 65th birthday today and celebrating the wonderful parents who raised me.

Mary, Don, and Irene

Mom and Dad were fair people who were very dedicated to their three children. They were supportive and immensely forgiving of Don, Mary, and me. The latter attribute included both not letting us get away with anything, while teaching us the importance of making life decisions that would make us better citizens of the world in which we inhabited.

Mom with her 1st grandchild, my daughter, Erin
Dad couldn’t just change out the toilet seat, he had to play around with it

Mom was the creative half of our parents, sewing all our clothes and actively involved in the musical community throughout her life. She was a master pianist and sang tenor equal to or better than most male tenors. She was also an activist, a trait I am happy to have inherited. Dad was the jokester of the two, but managed to balance that fun side with extraordinarily practical aspects of childrearing so we would become successful, contributing adults.

Mom and Dad were extremely kind – to family, friends, and strangers – and taught us to consider each and every person with whom we came in contact, as equal to ourselves, regardless of their station in life, their ethnicity, race, or religion. Us kids had a really good start in life because of their parenting, and now that we’re all three in our mid to very late 60s (that’s you, Don) I can proudly say we didn’t turn out all that bad.

Irene, Don, & Mary
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Lighten up Mondays

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Mother’s Day is behind us but not the humor centered around mothers. Here you go!

  • You know you’re a mom when picking up another human to smell their butt isn’t just normal, it’s necessary. (Same applies to grandmothers, or is that just me?)
  • Mother: one person who does the work of 20 for free.
  • Don’t wake up mom! There are at least seven species who eat their young, your mom may be one of them!
  • Mom #1: How do you get your sleepyhead son to get up in the morning? Mom#2: How? Mom#1: Put the cat on the bed. Mom #2: How does that help? Mom #1: The dog is already there.
  • A mother mouse and a baby mouse are walking along when suddenly a cat attacks them. The mother mouse shouts “BARK!” and the cat runs away. “See?” the mother mouse says to her baby. “Now do you see why it’s important to learn a foreign language
  • Sweater: something you wear when your mother gets cold.
  • Bought my Mum a mug which says, “Happy Mother’s day from the World’s Worst Son”. I forgot to mail it but I think she knows.

Lighten up Mondays

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Pain humor, just because.

  • Many years ago, the best painkiller was ice; it was particularly effective if you poured whiskey over it.
  • Throwback Thursday reminds me of when I only had to take one medication.
  • Being sick is just your body’s way of saying you’re way to awesome and you need to slow down so everyone else can catch up.
  • If you still have energy after walking up the stairs, your opinion about chronic pain is irrelevant.
  • Said the doctor to his patient, handing him a bottle of pills: “I want you to take one of these every day until I think of something else.”
  • My immune system attacks itself, what does yours do?
  • You know you’re in pain when the sun is too loud.
  • “But you don’t look sick.”  “Please tell me what sick looks like and I’ll try to do better next time.”
  • Why are there never any good side effects? Just once I’d like to read a medication bottle that says, “May cause extreme sexiness.”
  • I’m not one to brag, but I totally got out of bed today.
  • Where does it hurt? I’m sorry, I don’t understand the question.

Kindness Fridays

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Over the years I’ve discovered that when we are part of a community of people, our quality of life increases. The support of others can’t be beat. For me, community is like-minded people with a common thread through their lives that provide meaning and purpose for one’s day to day existence.

I found community in a writer’s group called AlzAuthors, a compendium of authors who have all been affected by Alzheimer’s disease and other dementia. All of us authors share our experiences through our non-fiction and fiction works to bring knowledge, comfort, and understanding to those on a similar journey to the one we have already completed. Trust me, we all wish such a group were not necessary; that the common thread we share didn’t involve the always fatal disease of Alzheimer’s and related dementia; but it is necessary and we’re filling a need that as of this writing doesn’t show any chance of abating.

I’ve never met any of these authors – I live in Washington State and the rest of the authors represent just about every state in our nation – but because of our common journeys, we are members of a community. Are we all politically aligned identically to each other? Probably not. What about religious practices, do we follow the same spiritual practices as every member of the group? Hardly, but it doesn’t matter. What we have in common does matter: we are dedicated to encouraging and helping families and individuals whose lives have been interrupted by Alzheimer’s disease. Speaking for myself, I am so glad that my novel, Requiem for the status quo, can reflect the good and the bad decisions I made and other individuals made, so that those who are still on the Alzheimer’s journey might do better because they know better. I hope you’ll get to know us AlzAuthors through our website and that you’ll become an AlzAuthors Reader Community once you’ve browsed through our bookstore. Click here to go directly to the AlzAuthors Bookstore to find a library of books – more than 140 as of today – that link directly to Amazon or other purchase outlets.

So that’s it. This week I celebrate the kindness I have found in the AlzAuthors Community. Sure beats going it alone.

Lighten up Mondays

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Last day of April and here comes May, pretty much my favorite month of the year: my grandson’s birthday, my birthday exactly one week later, and Mother’s Day. Let’s focus on birthdays and mothers for this week’s funnies.

  • You know you’re getting old when you go to an antique auction and three people bid on you.
  • Did you hear about the love affair between sugar and cream? It was icing on the cake.
  • Statistics show that those who have the most birthdays live the longest.

 

  • Why is a computer so smart? Because it listens to its Motherboard.
  • What did the mommy spider say to the baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.
  • All mothers have intuition. Great mothers have radar.
  • Simon’s mother said, “You won’t amount to anything because you procrastinate” to which Simon responded, “Oh yeah? Just you wait.”

Kindness Fridays

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The man with whom I chose to spend the rest of my life on our wedding day, February 10, 2000, is the subject of this week’s Kindness post.

My husband says he’s not blind, but sometimes I’m not so sure. I mean, if he has perfect vision, albeit corrected by glasses, how can he not see what I see?

  • No makeup whatsoever during the day unless I’m going somewhere or someone’s coming to our house. My face is multi-colored due to rosacea and sun damage. Without wearing liquid foundation, I’m a pretty scary sight to see. Apparently, the rose-colored glasses he wears don’t see those flaws.
  • When my absolutely fabulous hair stylist cuts my hair a wee bit too short because Molly and I got to talking and I lost track of the time and how much hair she cut off, I return home with something just short of a buzz cut. I walk in the door apologizing before I can even say, “Hello, honey, I’m home!” Jerry takes one look at me and says, “I see you got your hairs cut and you got your money’s worth. It looks nice.”
  • When I went through a period of very low body weight because of a medical condition, I focused on trying to gain weight because my clothes just hung on my bones. He said, “You are always beautiful to me, but I’d rather you be healthy and overweight than skinny and not well.”
  • A year ago, I had some nasty skin cancer removed from my right shin/calf area. One year later, the scar is still horrendous in my eyes and I’d venture to say, in most peoples’ eyes. The other day we were shopping at Target and as we passed the racks of women’s shorts I said, “Not gonna buy me any of those. No one wants to see these legs.” His response, “I do.”

So there you have it, this absolutely non-critical, always complimentary husband of mine is probably someone I don’t deserve, but he married me so he’s stuck with me. When I’ve said those words to him in the past, he’s responded, “And you’re stuck with me, aren’t we lucky?”

Lighten up Mondays

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The other day, I attended a photo session with my grandson and his parents. I managed to willingly make a fool of myself to make him laugh and smile for the camera, and it was my pleasure. Thus, photography is on my mind for this week’s funnies.

  • Photography is an art of observation. It has little to do with the things you see and everything to do with the way you see them. (Elliott Erwitt)
  • There are no bad pictures, that’s just how your face looks sometimes.
  • You might be a photographer’s child if you can’t play dress up without it becoming a photoshoot.
  • I am a plastic surgeon, a magician, a stylist, a social media guru, a therapist, and a master of light. I am a photographer.
  • Photographer nightmare: trying to get thirty half drunk & hungry people to look at you at the same time.
  • How to irritate your professional photographer. “After you take that shot, can you take the same one with my phone?”
  • A photographer went to a socialite party in New York. As he entered the front door, the host said, “I love your photographs, you must have a fantastic camera.” The photographer said nothing until the dinner was finished and then said, “That was a fabulous dinner, you must have a fantastic stove.”