In my post, President Obama says the “A” word: Alzheimer’s, I provided some Alzheimer’s statistics that focus on those who are predicted to be diagnosed with Alzheimer’s or other dementia in the years to come. I also talked about caregiver statistics.
One statistic that really resonates with me is the following: a new caregiver is set into action every 33 seconds because someone will develop Alzheimer’s every 33 seconds. In actuality, the stats are far greater than that. Caregivers are “created” every second of the day because there are countless diseases requiring the assistance of someone just like you and me – an unpaid caregiver for a loved one. I use the distinction of “unpaid” so as not to be confused with those who work as caregivers in the health care industry.
The following statement is attributed to former First Lady of the United States, Rosalynn Carter:
There are only four kinds of people in the world – those who have been caregivers,
those who are currently caregivers,
those who will be caregivers, and
those who will need caregivers.
I really don’t think there’s any way around it. How about you? Have you dodged the caregiver or being-cared-for bullet yet?
A certain sailor celebrating a long-awaited ship’s shore leave, got very inebriated. When he staggered back up the gangway, the captain sternly entered in the log: “Mate drunk tonight.”
When he saw the entry, the mate objected violently.
“Captain, the boat was moored – you know I’ve never been drunk on board before, never drunk on duty. If this stays on the record, I’ll never get work on another ship!”
Stone-hearted, the captain refused to modify his entry. “It is the truth, and it shall remain on the record.”
A few days later, the captain was checking over the log and came across an entry written by the mate: “Captain was sober today.” The outraged captain summoned the mate and accused him of creating a false impression.
“Anyone reading this entry will think my sobriety was unusual, that I’m usually drunk!” he bellowed.
“The statement is true,” the mate calmly asserted, “and it will remain in the log.”
Lest you think that Alzheimer’s has nothing to do with you, look at the following statistics provided by the Alzheimer’s Association:
By the year 2050, nearly one million new cases will be diagnosed each year – that’s one American developing Alzheimer’s every 33 seconds. Taken further, that most likely equates to nearly one and a half million new family caregivers each year – considering that at least one family member will be involved in managing a loved one’s care;
Ten million Baby Boomers will get Alzheimer’s;
On average, 40% of a person’s years with Alzheimer’s are spent in the most severe stage of the disease;
The number of Americans that die each year from Alzheimer’s disease has risen 66% since the year 2000;
Alzheimer’s is the sixth-leading cause of death in the United States;
Today, there are no Alzheimer’s survivors – none.
Please take time to read the article I’ve attached above and consider the following: We are going to pay for Alzheimer’s one way or the other – now, or later.
This is a disease that will affect you, your children, your grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and beyond. Burying our heads in the sand won’t solve anything. Please consider donating to the Alzheimer’s Association as well as contacting your state’s congressional leaders asking for greater federal funding for Alzheimer’s research. Why? Because of this staggering statistic:
According to the National Institute of Health, the federal government currently spends much less money on Alzheimer’s research, prevention, and cure than on other conditions such as cancer, heart disease, and HIV.
The above article recounts the personal feelings of a blogger who experienced his first Valentine’s Day without his wife who died on July 4, 2012. For those of us not experiencing such a loss, we may too readily try to point out that this “holiday” is just a Hallmark greeting card day, or florists and chocolate manufactures making lots of money day. It’s more than that – especially when so many memories are tied to the event. Whenever a “first time without” comes around on the calendar, the dread leading up to that date can be very troublesome, as it was for this blogger.
I recently watched a show in which interior designer, Nate Berkus, said the following about the things we have in our lives:
The truth is – that things matter. They have to because they’re what we live with and touch each and every day.
They represent what we’ve seen, who we’ve loved, and where we hope to go next.
They remind us of the good times and the rough patches and everything in between that’s made us who we are.
Events, celebrations, and the like provide the same type of life-shaping experiences. That’s why today is far more than a commercial and financial windfall for the greeting card, floral, and chocolate industries. Without someone with whom to celebrate the focus of this day, it becomes a non-day from which you can not escape. Thank God for the memories, the photos, even the many things around the house that represent the touch and essence of our Valentine.
The article above, written by blogger Richard Kenny, illustrates his ability to adapt to his mother’s dementia – especially when doing so involves carrying on a conversation with her. I love how Richard has figured out how to get around the frustrations that can exist when “normal” and meaningful conversations are few and far between – and nonsensical ones become the norm.
My dad and I thirteen years ago; and seven years before Alzheimer’s took him away from us.
Going with the flow is the rule of the day, the month, and the year, if you want to avoid stressing out when trying to converse with someone who is not able to enter your reality. The Alzheimer’s Association encourages this mantra: “If you don’t insist, they can’t resist.” Go with it – and you just might enjoy yourself!
Three sailors were stranded in a life raft with the captain after their ship had sunk in a typhoon. After going through the emergency rations, the captain gravely announced that there was only enough food for three people.
“One of you will have to swim for it, I’m afraid,” averting his eyes from the sharks circling the raft, “but to make it fair and square, I’m going to ask each of you a question. If you answer correctly, you stay; if you blow it, out you go.”
The three sailors nodded their agreement, and the captain turned to the first sailor.
“What was the boat that was sunk by an iceberg?”
“The Titanic,” answered the sailor with a sigh of relief.
“How many people were killed?”
“Three thousand, four hundred and seventy,” blurted the second, mopping the nervous sweat off his brow.”
“Correct,” noted the captain, then turned to the third sailor. “Name them.”
When was the last time you just soaked it all in? I’m not talking about soaking in the sun’s rays – hard to find in most places at this time of year anyway. And I’m not referring to settling your weary body down into a relaxing hot bath.
How about today, you decide to soak in all the good that is in your life?
But you say, “I have no time for that because the bad in my life far outweighs the good.” My response to that? Perhaps you need to even out the scales.
Right now, make a concerted effort to write down three things for which you can be grateful; things that encourage a smile on your face; things that make you forget – even for a second – all that weighs you down.
Now celebrate those three things by soaking in the feather light feeling they create. If that sensation is something you’d like to feel again, well – you’re in charge. Set aside time each day to allow the good to displace some of the bad.
If you celebrate even the smallest of good aspects of your life, you may discover that countless mini-parties await you. What have you got to lose?
A very brief blog entry from a fellow blogger. Some of you on your caregiving journey – or those who have recently ended that journey – will understand what is being said here.
There are these two nude statues, one of a man and the other of a woman, standing across from each other in a secluded park. A few hundred years after they’ve been put in place, an angel flutters down to them. A wave of his hand, and suddenly the statues come to life and the man and the woman step down from their pedestals.
(Photo credit: Wikipedia)
The angel says, “I have been sent to grant the mutual request you both have made after hundreds of years of standing across from each other, unable to move. But be quick – you only have fifteen minutes until you must become statues again.”
The man looks at the woman. They both flush and giggle, and then run off into some underbrush. The sound of great rustling comes from the bushes, and seven minutes later, they come back to the angel, obviously satisfied.
The angel smiles at the couple. “That was only seven minutes – why not go back and do it again?”
The former statues look at each other for a minute, and then the woman says, “Why not? But let’s reverse it this time – you hold down the pigeon, and I’ll poop on it.”
In a recent NY Times post, Catherine Rampell writes about how the economy is affecting Baby Boomers; more specifically that it’s not just a matter of postponing retirement, it’s the need to hold down more than one job to meet the daily – and future – essentials of their lives. Ms. Rampell is quick to point out, however, “(I)n the current listless economy, every generation has a claim to have been most injured.” Certainly that seems to be the case as I have heard that Generation X and the Millennials have complained that Baby Boomers are to blame for the state of the economy – present and future.
Crowd gathering on Wall Street after the stock market crash of October 1929. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Of this I am certain – each generation before us, and every generation after us, will contribute positively and negatively to the world as we know it. I have to believe that every generation has pointed their fingers at generations other than theirs, and talked about the good, the bad, and the ugly that permeates their times. Let’s look at those generations as posted on CNN, American Generations Through the Years: (figures and personalities provided by the Pew Research Center and CNN)
G.I./Greatest Generation: Pre-1928; Kate Hepburn and George H. W. Bush
Silent Generation: 1925 – 1945; Martin Luther King, Jr. and Tina Turner
Baby Boomers: 1946 – 1964; Oprah Winfrey and Michael Jordan
Generation X: 1965-1980; Jay-Z and Tiger Woods
Millennials: Post 1980; Christina Aguilera and Mark Zuckerberg
We’re all struggling in some way, and we’ll continue to struggle as we mimic the overall consensus felt through all generations. There are carefree times, and then there are all the rest of our days, and we get through them, because we must. We’re better for it, but it doesn’t feel like that while we’re going through it. I have to look to Brendan Marrocco, a twenty-six year old Iraq war veteran who lost all his limbs because of a roadside bomb in 2009. In an Associated Press story, in the Seattle Times, Brendan said he could get by without his legs, but he didn’t like living without arms. “Not having arms takes so much away from you. Even your personality … You talk with your hands. You do everything with your hands, and when you don’t have that, you’re kind of lost for a while.”
The end of January 2013, six weeks after getting a double arm transplant, Brendan said the following at a coming-out press conference about how he’s made it thus far:
Just not to give up hope. You know, life always gets better, and you’re still alive. And be stubborn. There’s a lot of people who will say you can’t do something. Just be stubborn and do it anyway.
Sobering words, and ones that force us to reassess our current situations. I’m not trying to minimize what you might be going through, nor of what’s going on in my life. It’s just that I personally can’t help but focus on Brendan’s plight and then consciously turn my eyes away from my me-ness, and towards other-people-ness. Is Brendan worse off as a Millennial who lost so much but gained a huge dose of intestinal fortitude, defined as strength of character; perseverance? If it were me, I would be wallowing in a very deep pit of self-pity. That doesn’t seem to be Brendan’s current location.
I don’t know how the first month of 2013 treated you but it kind of kicked me in the butt! I need some humor going into February so the list of celebrations I provide this month will lean more towards the humorous and creative side. I hope you enjoy!
A few weekly observances: Feb. 3 – Feb. 9 – Dump Your Significant Jerk Week; Feb. 7 – Feb. 14 – Have a Heart for a Chained Dog Week; Feb. 13. – Feb. 19 – International Flirting Week.
A few month of February observances: Adopt a Rescued Rabbit Month; Avocado and Banana Month; International Boost Self-Esteem Month; International Expect Success Month (makes sense!); National Chocolate Lover’s Month; Return Shopping Carts to Supermarket Month; Spunky Old Broads Month (now you’re talking!!!)
A few daily celebrations – cheers!
Feb. 5 World Nutella Day
Feb. 6 Lame Duck Day
Feb. 7 Wave All Your Fingers at Your Neighbor Day (as opposed to the one finger salute?)
Feb. 13 Madly in Love With Me Day
Feb. 16 Do a Grouch a Favor Day
Feb. 27 No Brainer Day – I can certainly support this one!!!
My wish for all of you is that you celebrate even the smallest of good happenings that come your way this month.
I think you’ll all agree that humor can be found in almost every situation in which we find ourselves. Even the distressing disease of dementia has its lighter moments. The article above, by fellow blogger Don Desonier, provides a moment he had with his wonderful wife Nancy. I think many of you will be able to visualize the scenario that this writer so adeptly describes.
Here’s a humorous story from my caregiving time with my father who died from Alzheimer’s complications in October 2007. On one of my visits to his assisted living facility in Oregon, he asked me to help him change his hearing aid batteries. So happy to have something to do that would benefit my father, I jumped at the opportunity to help him hear better – thereby greatly enhancing our conversational abilities.
Behind the ear aid (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
He pulled out his hearing aids and I pulled the dead batteries out and placed them on the coffee table. I turned my back for a couple seconds and upon refocusing my attention, I saw that my father had put a dozen other batteries on the coffee table – MIXED IN with the two that no longer worked. Had my father not put all the batteries in a pile I might have been able to readily discern the two recently removed batteries. As it was, it took us forty-five minutes to test the batteries and as luck would have it, the used-up batteries were the last two we tested.
At least I got a laugh out of it – after the initial frustration – and dad seemed to get a kick out of the fact that I was giggling about the process. And now more than five years later – I can still reflect on that experience with a smile on my face.
Harry was stunned to come home from work one evening and find his wife stuffing all her belongings into a suitcase.
“What on earth are you doing?” he cried.
“I can’t stand it anymore!” she shrieked. “Thirty-two years we’ve been married, and all we do is bicker and quarrel and ignore each other. I’m leaving!”
Stunned, Harry watched his wife close the suitcase, lug it down the stairs, and proceed to walk out of the house … out of his life.
Suddenly he was galvanized into action. Running into the bedroom and grabbing a second suitcase, he yelled back at his wife,
“Sylvia, you’re right, you’re absolutely right – and I can’t bear it either. Wait a minute, and I’ll go with you!”
The article above is from one of my favorite bloggers, Frangipani Singaporenicum. Her journey as a caregiver involves her mother. Her storytelling of what that involves is really quite genius.
(Photo credit: Wikipedia)
This article addresses the question as to whether or not the person with dementia is the same person they were prior to onset of disease; and if they are not …
then who are they?
Once you’ve read her article I believe you’ll have a clearer perception of what dementia takes away – and leaves behind – during the progression of the disease.
The article above by a fellow blogger who recently lost his wife due to complications of dementia, echos my sentiments about the need to invite others to join you on your caregiving journey. Walking the path alone is not only inadvisable, but in most instances, it’s impossible. With so many unknowns waiting around the corner, every caregiver needs to enlist the help of those who can effectively support him or her, and as a result, provide much needed assistance to the one being cared for.
(Photo credit: Wikipedia)
I’m a firm believer of team support, as I stated in my article: Caregiving: The Ultimate Team Sport. Another article, Solo Caregiving, provides encouraging ways in which to recruit team members when there are no family members on which to rely.
Taking care of yourself is not selfish. Developing a team of caregiver-helpers goes a long way towards taking care of numero uno – YOU!
I’ve attached, above, a link to a fellow blogger’s site. The message is short and instructional.
What resonated with me about the statement provided in the link, is that each of us has experienced the after effects of walking in the midst of someone’s bad day and we inadvertently become the recipient of that bad day’s vibes. And sometimes the shoe is on the other foot. It’s unavoidable. I guess that’s why the words of wisdom provided in the link, are words that we all need to take to heart.
Old Timothy O’Daly was clearly on his deathbed. So his son, Liam, was completely taken aback when the old man plucked at Liam’s sleeve, drew him close, and said, “My boy, it’s time for you to go for the Protestant minister.”
“But, Dad.” gasped Liam in surprise, “what on earth would a good Catholic like yourself be wanting with a Protestant minister at a time like this – meaning no disrespect of course.”
“Get the minister,” ordered his dad fiercely, and after a few more sputtering protests, his son hurried off to honor what might be his father’s last request. He was back with the Reverend Wilson within forty-five minutes, and listened in dismay outside the door as the minister converted his father and administered the Protestant faith’s last rites.
“His distress, however, paled beside that of Father McGuire, who hurried up the stairs past the departing Reverend Wilson. “Tim, Tim, why?” he cried, bursting into the old man’s room. “We went to St. Joseph’s together. We were altar boys at Our Lady of the Sacred Heart. I was there at your First Holy Communion and you attended the first Mass I performed. How in the world could you do such a thing?”
“Paddy,” said O’Daly, leaning back against his pillows, “I figured if somebody had to go, better one of them than one of us.”
When I think about the subject of having to tell someone some bad news, I think of the conversation: “I’m not gonna tell them – YOU tell them!” “No, I’m not gonna tell them – YOU tell them!”
No one wants to be the harbinger of bad news – especially news that will change peoples’ lives forever. When friends and family need to hear the news that someone in the family has recently been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s or other dementia you wish it was as easy as the task you avoided at work – telling your cubical-mate that he has bad breath. Nope – when lives are at stake – and quality of life issues are at stake – the ballgame changes – certainly not for the better.
In the attached article above, you’ll read the story about a family who had to make the agonizing decision about who to tell about a wife’s early dementia diagnosis – and when to tell them of the news. What’s so beautiful about this husband’s telling of the story, is how much he took his wife’s feelings into account when determining the best conversational course to take. The route he and his adult stepchildren chose was not one of denial, such as can be the case in some instances, rather, they faced the reality of this cosmic shift in their lives, and did what worked best for them and for their loved one.
Each circumstance is different – and those involved need to make appropriate decisions that fit the dynamics of their particular situation. (It’s certainly not a one size fits all solution.) And let’s face it – when someone starts out on this caregiving journey – it’s definitely a matter of on-the-job training. In the above family – it appears to have been done quite well.
One day, three men are out having a relaxing day fishing when suddenly they catch a mermaid. After they haul the mermaid up in a net, she promises that if the men set her free, she will grant each of them a wish. The first man doesn’t believe it, so he says, “All right, if you can really grant wishes, then double my IQ.” The mermaid says, “Done.” Suddenly the first man starts to flawlessly recite Shakespeare and analyze it with extreme insight.
(Photo credit: Wikipedia)
The second man is so amazed, he looks at the mermaid and says, “Triple my IQ.” The mermaid says, “Done.” The second man starts to recite solutions to mathematical problems that have been stumping all of the scientists in various fields from physics to chemistry.
The third man is so enthralled with the changes in his friends, he says, “Quintuple my IQ.” The mermaid looks at him and says, “You know, I normally don’t try to change people’s minds when they make a wish, but I really wish you’d reconsider.” The man responds, “Nope, I want you to increase my IQ times five, and if you don’t, I won’t set you free.”
“You don’t know what you’re asking, it’ll change your entire view of the universe. Won’t you ask for something else – a million dollars – anything?” the mermaid insists. No deal; the third man insisted on having his IQ increased by five times its usual power. So the mermaid finally relented and said, “Done.”
The above link, from a December 2012 NBC News report, addresses the conversations that many of us – well, many of you anyway – still need to have with your parents. (My mother died in 1994, my father in 2007 – those conversations have long since taken place.) In many respects, my brother and sister and I were fortunate because in our family, the topic of sickness and death seemed no different from discussing that night’s dinner menu – perhaps even easier. That’s just how it was in our household growing up. But I’m aware that universally, that is not the case.
GIFTS. Who doesn’t like receiving gifts? Most of us get a kick out of being handed a package with a fully wrapped surprise within and told to “open it!” “What, for me?” Yes – for you. Perhaps the gift is something we didn’t expect, or we’ve sufficiently hinted our exact wishes and finally someone gifted us with that long sought after item. Fun, isn’t it? Someone cared enough to gift you with something you’ve always wanted or you receive something that you didn’t know you wanted, but it turns out, you do!!!
THE GIFT THAT KEEPS ON GIVING. A few years ago, I succeeded in convincing my wonderful hubby that we needed to put together our “last wishes” which of course includes a Will, but more importantly, an Advanced Health Care Directive. My husband is one of those who isn’t exactly comfortable sitting around the dinner table – or any table for that matter – talking about death. I get that – I really do. So I couched this discussion by talking about what a gift my parents, and his parents, gave their families by specifically outlining what to do when it came time to do something.
When your loved one is heading towards the great beyond, it’s comforting to already have his or her wishes on paper and ready to execute – no pun intended. I’ll use my father as an example. My father died at the age of 89 on October 13, 2007. Official cause of death was prostate cancer but advanced Alzheimer’s was a huge factor in his death. There is no way my father would have a) survived cancer surgery; and b) even wanted cancer surgery at that stage of his dying. His Advanced Health Care Directive very clearly stated his wishes and us three siblings had copies of that document and respectfully went along with his wishes. Dad saved us the stress of making an extremely difficult guesstimate of what he would have wanted in the midst of that situation. His dying was already an emotional experience so I can’t imagine having some sort of discussion about when to stop treating his illnesses.
The legal document, drafted years earlier, was drafted for this specific time. Even if dad had been conscious – and he was not – his dementia would have prevented him from making a well-informed decision. If ever there was a time when dad’s gift was ready to be presented – this was it. That gift allowed us to spend our last hours with him simply loving him; singing to him; and telling him how grateful we were to have him as our dad. Beautiful.
You don’t have to wait until you are 50 years or older to put your wishes in print. Old people aren’t the only ones dying who require some sort of affirmative decision-making. Someone in their thirties could be in a horrific vehicle accident and end up lingering on the precipice of death. A forty-year old person could have a stroke and be on that same precipice. It’s never too early to do something about your exit from this world as we know it. You can always change your mind later – you decide that you do, or do not, want hydration, so you revise the document. That’s the beauty of word processing – it’s changeable, and once you get that revised version documented by witnesses, you’re good to go! Literally.
If you choose to use an attorney, you can go through the local Bar Association for referrals or you can attempt the same outcome by doing it yourself. Many office supply stores have boiler plate legal documents you can readily purchase – but be certain to purchase the forms that contain the required legal verbiage for your state or territory. Additionally, organizations such as Compassion and Choices provides forms that you can download from their website, even a form that has a Dementia Provision. Who woulda thunk? Not me.
The Holidays may be over, but the season of gift-giving is not. Won’t you consider giving your loved ones one more gift this year?
Jimmy and Kathy are newlyweds in the honeymoon suite on their wedding night, and Kathy is in the bathroom.
As Jimmy is getting undressed, he says to himself, “How am I going to tell her? How am I going to tell my new wife that I have the world’s smelliest feet?” Then he throws his socks underneath the bed.
Kathy walks out of the bathroom, and, too chicken to face her, Jimmy runs past her and goes into the bathroom.
Kathy sits on the edge of the bed and says to herself, “How am I going to tell him? How am I going to tell my new husband that I have the world’s worst breath? I’ve got to tell him, and I know just how to do it.”
Just then, Jimmy walks out of the bathroom. Kathy runs up to him, gives him a huge wet kiss, pulls back and says, “Honey, I’ve got to tell you something.”
Jimmy says, “Yeah, I know. You just ate my socks.”
Attention one and all! There’s a new website out that will be addressing the challenges of being a caregiver. The author/owner of this website, Don Desonier, is coming from the perspective of someone who very recently lost his spouse as a result of dementia complications.
Don’s five-year journey as a caregiver provided him with heart-rending experiences from which he garnered exceptional insight and wisdom. I personally look forward to his article postings – so much so, that I became his first blog follower. At the very least – why don’t you check out the website and visit from time to time. I feel confident that you’ll walk away feeling renewed with the realization that you’re not alone, and somehow or another – there’s a way through this difficult journey that you’re on.
I commend this Blogger, and I love him. Don is my brother and he was an extraordinary caregiver to his wife of almost twenty-five years.
There are SO many items to cover this first month of 2013 so I’m going to work up to the daily celebrations by providing you with a sampling of Weekly and Monthly notable items that you can look forward to in 2013:
The month of January is:
Artichoke and Asparagus Month
Get Organized Month (makes sense – New Year’s Resolution perhaps?)
International Brain-Teaser Month (I don’t get it)
Poverty in America Awareness Month
International Quality of Life Month
National Stalking (not Stocking) Awareness Month
National Volunteer Blood Donor Month
Be Kind to Food Servers Month
Bath Safety Month – what? Is this the only month we’re extra careful when stepping in and out of the tub?
January weekly celebrations/events:
Jan. 1-7: Diet Resolution Week
Jan. 2-8: Someday We’ll Laugh about This Week
Jan. 3-7: Women’s Self-Empowerment Week
Jan. 11-17: Cuckoo Dancing Week (as I’ve said before, I don’t make these things up)
Jan. 16-20: National Soccer Coaches of America Week
Jan. 20-26: Clean out your In-Box week (I believe this applies to e-mail In-Box and physically-on-your-desk In-Box)
Jan. 20-26: Hunt for Happiness Week
Jan. 21-25: No Name Calling Week
Jan. 28-Feb.2: National Cowboy Poetry Gathering Week
Lest you feel as though the end of the Holiday Season should bring about deep depression and regrets, simply read the above for a pick-me-up throughout the month and look at the January Daily Celebrations to discover the uniqueness of this first month of the year.
One of the sideshows at a circus featured a strong man who squeezed an orange until it appeared to be completely dry. When he finished, the strong man’s manager challenged anybody in the audience to come forward and try to get one last drop out of the super-compressed piece of fruit. To make the offer a bit more enticing, the manager offered a thousand dollars to anyone who successfully eked out even one tiny drop of juice.
A weight lifter with bulging muscles bounced up onto the stage, grabbed the orange from the manager, and pressed it with all his might. Nothing came out.
Next, a big, burly construction worker sauntered up and took the orange from the exhausted weight lifter. After ten minutes of intense squeezing, and a lot of grimacing, the construction worker finally admitted defeat.
“No other takers?” the manager asked with a satisfied sneer. “May I try?” responded a short, skinny bespectacled woman from the back row. The manager couldn’t keep a straight face as he and the rest of the crowd watched as the stranger made her way up to the front.
(Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Suddenly, the laughter stopped when, to everyone’s amazement, the woman picked up the orange and squeezed a puddle of juice onto the floor.
Flabbergasted, the manager sputtered, “How the heck did you do that?”
In Washington State, there are currently 150,000 people diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease. In the rest of the Nation, more than 5 million have Alzheimer’s disease. That number will jump to 16 million by the year 2050. Most of us envision an elderly person with some sort of dementia. We might even expect it to occur in those 85 or older. Listen to me Baby Boomers – young and not-so-young – the number of people diagnosed before the age of 65 – known as early-onset Alzheimer’s – is more common than you think. In the United States alone, those with early-onset disease currently number 200,000.
That number decreased by one when my exceptional sister-in-law died on July 4, 2012 at the age of 69. Just about the time that Baby Boomers should be anxiously making their final retirement plans – such as was the case with my brother and his wife – they are instead dealing with the challenges of managing a disease for which there is no cure.
Sixty-four year old Lon Cole, a resident of Puyallup, Washington, is one of the 200,000. The local NBC affiliate, King5 in Seattle, Washington, ran a touching story about this gentleman. I hope you will take the time to look at this news article: Alive and Thankful: Living with early-onset Alzheimer’s. Those who have managed, or are currently managing, the care of a loved one with early-onset disease, will be touched by this family’s story.
I have been asked to hold workshops at two different Middle School/Junior High Schools in the next few weeks in an attempt to show that the gap between us Baby Boomers and the pre-teen/young teen population isn’t as big as one might think.
Photo by KF. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
The age group of this audience is not one with which I have ever worked but I absolutely love stretching my skill set so I’m very excited to take on this task. I hope to deliver a workshop that engages the younger age group and leaves them with the tools needed to be more comfortable connecting with people in older age groups.
Description of the workshop, submitted to the schools: There is so much to be shared between generations, but we often miss out because we feel as though we speak different languages – and sometimes we do. For example, when you say that something’s “filthy,” your grandparents might have said it was “boss.” Believe it or not, your grandparents, and your great grandparents, were your age once so you do have that in common, and while it’s true that there is a lot to learn from older generations, they can learn a lot from you, too.
That’s where you come in. We all know that there are obvious differences between the two generations, given the advancement of technology and the like, but I think a closer look at those differences brings about the realization that many similarities exist but they are just dressed differently.
I covet your input so please feel free to leave some suggestions and/or comments below.
A lawyer is standing at the gate to heaven, and St. Peter is listing the lawyer’s sins:
Defending a large corporation in a pollution suit when he knew they were guilty;
Defending an obviously guilty murderer because the fee was high;
Overcharging many clients;
Prosecuting an innocent woman because a scapegoat was needed in a controversial case … and so the list continued.
The lawyer objects and begins to argue his case. He admits all these things but argues, “Wait, I’ve done some charity in my life too.”
St. Peter looks in his book and says, “Yes, I see. Once you gave a dime to a panhandler and once you gave an extra nickel to the shoeshine boy, correct?”
The lawyer gets a smug look on his face and replies, “Yes.”
St. Peter turns to the angel next to him and says, “Give this guy fifteen cents and tell him to go to hell.”
In the article linked above, a fellow blogger provides an exquisite sampling of the types of circumstances some life journeyers may be going through resultant from losses that have placed them in a difficult transitionary time in their lives.
Chances are all of us will experience more than one of the transitions that Don frames in this article that so delicately – and movingly – touches on the topic of grief and loss that occur when “first” occasions without someone come around on the calendar.
May all of you receive the comfort you need during the “first” times on your grief journey.
Chances are all of us will experience more than one of the transitions that Don frames in this article that so delicately – and movingly – touches on the topic of grief and loss that occur when “first” occasions without someone come around on the calendar.
Living: the ultimate team sport 