Bullying: now versus then.
In January of this year, I provided a workshop for middle school students (8 to 12 years old) during their school’s annual Health Fair. Given my predisposition to focus on the older population during my career, I was asked to bring forth a topic that might resonate with, and educate, the children who attended my workshops; something about old people, a topic about which they supposedly knew very little.
The title of my workshop was Your Grandparents are Cooler than you Think. My goal was to bridge the gap that exists between those aged sixty years and older, with the younger-aged set. My sophisticated, yet relatable, PowerPoint presentation offered many comparison and contrast examples that tended to disprove that any gap exists between such disparate groups. (That was my goal.) One can’t deny that some obvious differences exist, but the similarities with subject matters that really count are quite revealing. First, I offer you a quote from the Atlantic Journal, challenging you to guess when this particular entry was published. I read this same quote to the middle school students.
The world is too big for us. Too much is going on. Too many crimes. Too much violence and excitement. Try as you will, you get behind in the race in spite of yourself. It’s a constant strain to keep peace … and still, you lose ground.
Science empties its discoveries on you so fast that you stagger beneath them in hopeless bewilderment. The political world now changes so rapidly, you’re out of breath trying to keep pace with who’s in and who’s out.
Everything is high pressure. Human nature can’t endure much more!
If you guessed that the above quote was ripped from today’s headlines – or thereabouts – you are incorrect. These vital words were written 180 years ago, published on June 16, 1833. The common sentiments of that time seem almost indistinguishable from what is in the minds of people today. Amazing. I guess we’re not much different from the people living in 1833.
One of the topics these middle schoolers and I discussed was Bullying. The students were divided into eight groups of five each and asked to discuss the similarities, if any, of this globally prevalent problem. Their insights were astounding. Here is my paraphrase of some of their comments:
I think bullying in the olden days was more physical, whereas today, it’s psychological in nature.
Bullying a long time ago was limited to one-on-one interaction. Today, if just one person is bullied, that act is broadcast to thousands just by the push of an “enter” key on ones computer.
I think there is little difference between bullying now, versus then. You see, the motivation is the same; the intent to make someone else feel small; to exert ones power over another. It doesn’t matter what that looks like or when it took place, the motivation remains the same.
I was humbled by these students, but I should not have been surprised by their astute thinking processes. Perhaps the person who learned the most during my workshop was the presenter. I thought I needed to convince them of how similar their elders are to them. I guess the joke was on me.
The inspiration to write this article can be attributed to the driver behind me on my way home from the store today who bullied me by riding my bumper the entire way home. My going the speed limit must have been quite an affront to her sensibilities. (I couldn’t pull over to the side of the road but she had plenty of opportunities to pass me – evidently choosing not to do so.) At almost sixty years of age, I felt threatened, powerless, and humiliated.
Living: the ultimate team sport 
March 29, 2013 at 8:35 am
That’s never fun, but you drive the speed limit because you’re from Washington, Irene! Ha! The Californians that moved there are the tailgaters–sorry anyone from CA, but true! I lived in CA and you just can’t tailgate in WA! How do I know all this? Well, I kept seeing your gravatar (colorful thing it is) on Terry’s blog–still don’t know how I ended up there–but I have low vision due to a genetic disease and miss things. I just noticed your user name (whatever it’s called on WP) and said, “I know that zip code!” I grew up on the Eastside (semi-anonymous on here) and moved to downtown Kirkland during college and then to Seattle, where I always was, anyway. I remember when there wasn’t anything in Redmond–how funny!
I left WA 10 years ago in my late 20s (no Boomer–near 40) due to my connective tissue disorder and need for a desert climate, but my dad is still up there (older than you) with most of my family and a BIG Boomer (and out jogging a lot and doing great). He actually was born before the cut-off, but close enough. Class of ’62 from an urban HS in Seattle that he loved. You know, my dad is such a Doo-Wap, Seattle Boomer that I tried to get him to start something online just for all his Boomer buddies from his youth, but he likes his boring FB and exercising non-stop and that’s it. My family doesn’t know where I blog (I hope), but I sent my dad a post I wrote about him in the ’60s and narrowly escaping the draft that oddly fit in with my blog on my health issues and he put it with the rest of his nostalgia. He’s so internet savvy that he probably found me, but he can be very sweet and charming at times.
Well, glad to know you–I just had to comment since Seattle-types are chatty and usually friendly in my book–at least way back when (it’s why I leave long comments, but Seattle isn’t the same to me, anymore). Btw, I have no tolerance for bullies, either. Did I bully the Californians–maybe you came from there? They drive 100 mph on the freeways in the rain in SoCal and slide across 6 lanes! So scary! In my working years before SSDI (disability) entered my life, I ran non-profit programs for at-risk youth and always had a zero tolerance policy due to the bullying I endured growing up. Sure learned how to fight from it. Nice work you do in real life and with your blog (great post)! Those kids are right about today’s bullying. See you at Terry’s place where I am the big minority (lol)…
A 🙂 (the l-o-n-g commenter)
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March 17, 2013 at 2:17 pm
I get tailgated on a lot. I never thought of it as bullying but that is exactly what it is and it IS threatening by intention. Thanks fir a good post today.
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March 17, 2013 at 2:28 pm
Indeed. Tailgating seems to wreak of aggression in my book – especially when the offender has the option of a) switching into another lane; b) passing the person who is going the speed limit; or c) how about going the speed limit Mr. or Ms. Tailgater? Now imagine being on a dark road and the offending vehicle is on your bumper – that’s the kind of stuff scary movies are made of. Glad you liked my Post. Happy and safe trails to you.
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March 17, 2013 at 3:05 pm
Thanks, Irene. I do drive less because there are more tailgators than there used to be. Have a safe week.
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