Lighten up Mondays

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I can’t NOT provide humor about the hot weather being experienced country-wide, and globally this summer.

*****

The summer after college graduation, I was living at home, fishing in the daytime to enjoy the hot days, spending nights with my friends—generally just hanging out. One afternoon my grandfather, who never went to college, stopped by.

Concerned with how I was spending my time, he asked about my future plans. I told him I was in no hurry to tie myself down to a career.

“Well,” he replied, “you better start thinking about it. You’ll be thirty before you know it.”

“But I’m closer to twenty than to thirty,” I protested. “I won’t be thirty for eight more years.”

“I see,” he said, smiling. “And when will you be twenty again?”

*****

You know it’s hot when:

  • You can make instant sun tea.
  • You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron.
  • The temperature drops below 95, you feel a bit chilly.
  • You discover that in July, it takes only 2 fingers to drive your car.
  • You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
  • Hot water now comes out of both taps.
  • It’s noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is out on the streets.
  • No one would dream of putting vinyl upholstery in a car or not having air conditioning.
  • Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, “What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?”
  • You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
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