Living: the ultimate team sport

Lighten up Mondays

Posted on August 22, 2016 Updated on August 26, 2016

With the 2016-2017 school year quickly approaching, I thought I’d provide some parenting humor for those with small kids, and those who managed to live beyond the early parenting years.

When I get a headache, I take two aspirin and keep away from children, just like it says on the bottle.

Parenting without a sense of humor is like being an accountant who sucks at math.

Sound travels slowly: sometimes the things you say when your kids are teenagers don’t reach them until they’re in their 40s.

Saturday is the day kids jump out of bed at 6am with all the energy they claim they didn’t have all week long.

When you want to punish your kids, don’t take away their electronics. Just take away the charger and watch the fear in their eyes as they use it less and less while the battery slowly dies.

And finally:

He lead me to the bedroom, pulled back the covers, and gave me a coy smile. “Tonight, it’s all about you.” And then he watched the kids while I slept uninterrupted for 14 hours.