Here’s a few one-liners – or so:
Question: How can you tell a guy really doesn’t have much to offer? Answer: His bride shows up at the wedding with a date.
Poor loser: I called Dial-a-Prayer and they hung up on me.
Ever notice how the person who remarks, “Well, that’s the way the ball bounces,” is usually the one who dropped the ball?
Why are builders afraid to have a thirteenth floor, but book publishers aren’t afraid to have a Chapter Eleven?
I dreamed that God sneezed, and I didn’t know what to say to him.