Lighten up Mondays.
Half truths – sometimes sound like lies:

A certain sailor celebrating a long-awaited ship’s shore leave, got very inebriated. When he staggered back up the gangway, the captain sternly entered in the log: “Mate drunk tonight.”
When he saw the entry, the mate objected violently.
“Captain, the boat was moored – you know I’ve never been drunk on board before, never drunk on duty. If this stays on the record, I’ll never get work on another ship!”
Stone-hearted, the captain refused to modify his entry. “It is the truth, and it shall remain on the record.”
A few days later, the captain was checking over the log and came across an entry written by the mate: “Captain was sober today.” The outraged captain summoned the mate and accused him of creating a false impression.
“Anyone reading this entry will think my sobriety was unusual, that I’m usually drunk!” he bellowed.
“The statement is true,” the mate calmly asserted, “and it will remain in the log.”